written and posted by members of Lancashire Dead Good Poets' Society

Friday 5 August 2011

Polystyrene

09:41:00 Posted by Lindsay 3 comments

I like a good spine tingling shiver. The type I get when I read a tale with an unexpected ending, or watching a band live.
The types of shivers I don’t like are the ones people enjoy freaking you out with. My quirk is polystyrene. Not the look or feel of it, it’s the sound it makes when it’s being handled, scraped against things or broken. So just stop it all of you. It’s not funny. I mean it. I’ll go home. Actually...no, I won’t, I’ll come and ram the little white globs of plastic up each nostril ‘til you cry. So stop it with the polystyrene. It makes me shiver and my teeth itch.
Other more minor shiver inducers are;

Housework
Vomit
Offal
The words ‘gusset’ and ‘claggy’
Chris Moyles


Pretty self explanatory I should think. Especially Chris Moyles. My worst nightmare would be a parcel delivered to my house containing Chris Moyles wrapped in polystyrene with a court order for me to repeat the word ‘gusset’ whilst listening to him scrape the ‘styrene across my vomit covered mop. I couldn’t fit offal in there, sorry.

I like good shivers though, I can’t tell what can bring them as otherwise they would be too predictable and there would be no shiver, either of excitement, anticipation, anxiety or fear. I like the ones I get when I see pure talent. Seeing someone talented in any walk of life galvanises me, and reassures me that there is more to us than shopping, eating or gossiping. It makes me feel like there is only me and that person in the room at that moment, I hear only them, I see only them, I experience their talent alone. Good poetry, music, art, lyricism, or comedies all make me feel almost spiritual for a moment. You have to see it in the flesh though. TV is ok, but nothing beats the experience of seeing it in front of you, I only wish I could do it more.


But get away with that polystyrene no matter how talented you are or up the nostril it goes mate.

3 comments:

Ashley Lister said...

Do people often say the words 'claggy' and 'gusset' to you?

:-)

Great post.

Ash

Query said...

Bonkers. :-P

I'm with you on the Chris Moyles thing. Actually, ramming polystyrene up his nostrils should be his afterlife comeuppance.

Damp incendiary device said...

Lindsay, I completely agree about the spiritual feeling when you're in the presence of talent. Theatre can be overwhelmingly powerful in that respect.

Gusset ;)