Winter Blues

 by Ashley Lister

 Is it me or is the news getting more depressing?

Over the past few weeks there’ve been some heart-breaking and tragic stories in the news. We’ve had the posthumous allegations against Jimmy Savile. Whether these stories are true or not, all the news coverage is still a sickening reminder of the fashions that people openly wore in the 70s. We’ve had all those stories from the Tory party conference about what Darth Cameron intends to do if he is allowed to continue his apocalyptic reign of doom. It’s good to know we’ll be allowed to beat the shit out of burglars if they break into our homes. It’s just a shame that, under the current government, no one will be able to afford their own home before much longer.

As winter draws closer, the news will invariably become grimmer. Fuel bills will increase; sunlight hours will decrease; the weather, generally, will grow more unpleasant and, worst of all, everyone will be talking about football.

To that end, I suggest we should try and introduce some counter measures against the impending hiemal depression. I’ve been scouring the internet for ways to beat the winter blues and I’ve stumbled on five potential ideas that might be of use.

1) Express your creativity: You’ve come to the right place for this one. Write a poem and share it with us here at the Dead Good Blog.

2) Walk a dog: This one involves fresh air and the companionship of something furry with the ability to lick its own nether regions. Who could ask for more?

3) Talk with friends: And I mean talk! None of this txt msg wnk or tweeting or chat-room bollocks. Face-to-face talking where you can smell your friend’s nasty breath. (NB – don’t tell your friends that they have nasty breath).

4) Do something different: such as visiting a poetry event, like the one that will be occurring at the No. 5 Café on Friday October 26^th. It’s an Open Mic event with a theme of Ghostly Goings-On. Poetry begins at 6:00pm and it should be a great night’s entertainment.

5) Stay away from weirdoes like Dead Jimmy Savile and Darth Cameron. This, I feel, is self explanatory. It also helps to stay away from weirdoes who enjoy talking about football although, on this blog, that’s sometimes unavoidable.

If you have any personal suggestions for how to beat the winter blues, please share them in the comments box below.