Humdinger

I'd never heard the word before this week, let alone knew what it meant, but I figured if something is going to be worthy of being called a humdinger, then at a minimum it should both hum and ding - and that train of thought led me into the wonderful world of vintage American circus carriages, or wagons as they call them in the USA.

American circus wagon i - a Calliope

This specimen above is what is known as a Calliope and I'm assured it would have hummed and dinged with a vengeance. It was a steam-powered mechanical musical box on wheels, pumping out the tunes that lent excitement to the circus experience for millions of enthused American families from the mid-1850s onwards. 

a recording of classic circus calliope sounds

Some of the circus wagons were so ostentatiously ornate they could have rivalled royal carriages (except their gilt was fake). They looked real humdingers though, the sort of thing (see below) that Liberace might ride in. Or maybe Donald Trump in his pomp, laden with his medals and insignia, happily waving those little hands at a brain-dead adoring public. (Presidency as circus - pass the sick bag.)

American circus wagon ii - fit for a felonious president

If you're really captivated by them, then maybe the Circus World Museum in Baraboo, Wisconsin is for you. (It's not for me. I won't be visiting Trumpland.) The museum claims to have the largest collection of circus wagons and is a major participant in the annual Great Circus Parade held since 1963, a sort of humdingery overdrive-past. 

In case you're wondering why the musical circus wagons were called Calliopes (and I hope you were), I shall tell you. They were named after the Greek goddess Kalliope (Καλλιόπη), literally "beautiful voiced". She was the eldest of Zeus and Mnemosyne's daughters, the famed nine muses of Greek mythology. (The word museum derives from muses, incidentally.) Anyway, young Calliope was the one specifically revered as the inspiration of poets and singers. She was also the mother of underworldly Orpheus.

Calliope (Greek goddess of poetry and song)

As well as being famed for the ecstatic harmony of that voice and the eloquence with which she spoke, Calliope was often depicted in art holding a writing tablet and was recognised as the goddess of epic poetry, muse to Homer and the Ancient Greek poets. Given all that, I thought I'd feature her in today's poem. It's fresh from the Imaginarium, though not quite an epic, and comes with the usual caveat that I might revise it on reflection.

Calliope As Humdinger

It's speed dating night on Mount Helikon

whose singles bar is brightly holding out

against the enfolding purple twilight and 

inside ouzo, retsina and nervous laughter

flow. Eligible young gods and goddesses

and a few honorary mortals glow in robes

and finery, all golden smiles and flashing

thighs. Aphrodite's hosting for Hellas TV,

their media van in the car-park alongside

the sports cars and SUVs that Olympians

must be seen driving these days. Hermes

flew in by helicopter, caused a bit of a stir

and Hephaestus, a life lived on accelerants,

stumps irrepressible into the throng, orders

a Metaxa, downs it in one. He's got the hots

for the talent with decorous downcast eyes.

Naiads and salty Nereids too long alone in

their lakes, rivers and seas, seeking a catch

face competition from three Graces and all

nine muses, the talented daughters of  Zeus

and Mnemosyne. They're each an equal for

any Greek man, can speak in their allotted

minutes about astronomy, history, comedy

poetry, politics, folklore, dance and more -

just check their socials, each muse not only 

beautiful, but also a credit to the matriarchy.

Seems our lucky boys are spoiled for choice. 

But Calliope is the event's real humdinger,

destined to snag gorgeous Prince Oeagrus 

the wild sorb apple, just the perfect match.

She could perhaps have written this script,

given her way with words. Maybe she did.

In her mind, Parnassus Productions presents...

Thanks for reading, S ;-)