Friends A Friend in Need is a Friend Indeed

 

Friends are the family we choose for ourselves. We become connected by common interests or something happens to throw us together. I’m lucky to have long-lasting and some life-long friends. I value very highly the times we share together. We laugh, we reminisce and collectively, we can remind each other of any bits we forget, especially now we are ‘grown ups.’

Last week, I enjoyed lunch out with three friends. We met at work in 1974. We joined at different times that year, as teenagers, and we’ve been together ever since. Life and work took us in different directions and away from each other, but we’ve always stayed connected. It’s great to get together and catch up. Three of us hit seventy last year, and the other one not too far behind, so knees, hips and general health come into the conversation. We laughed at a joke that we’d all collapsed over circa 1975, when a colleague had to escape the office before the punchline – she was laughing so much and a superior staff member was there – we didn’t want to get into trouble. We were the mostly well-behaved generation doing as we were told by seniors. I can’t remember exactly how long we worked together, but it was many fantastic years. One day, we each wrote down where we thought we’d be in ten years’ time. I think it was a small note book that got passed round. Our individual paragraphs will have been hilarious, and I don’t know what happened to the evidence, but ten years passed and we were still there. All good things come to an end and one by one we spread our wings but remain forever friends. And eventually, our lunch came to an end, after food, drinks and more drinks. An hour became two, then suddenly it was half past four and the sun was sliding down behind the trees. Farewell, until next time.

“This, too, will pass.” I’ve been the needy one for a while due to some tough times. Every day, I’ve been thankful for messages from friends checking in on me with good wishes, advice and offers of help. They keep me smiling and working towards better times. Reliable, trustworthy, caring people. These are my friends, small in number, but top quality. I know I’m privileged. I also know that it is important to be a good friend in return. My gang can rely on me to be there for them.

I found this poem,

Friends for Life 

We are friends
I got your back
You got mine,
I’ll help you out
Anytime!
To see you hurt
To see you cry
Makes me weep
And wanna die
And if you agree
To never fight
It wouldn’t matter

Who’s wrong or right
If a broken heart
Needs a mend
I’ll be right there
Till the end
If your cheeks are wet
From drops of tears
Don’t worry
Let go of your fears
Hand in hand
Love is sent,
We’ll be friends
Till the end!!!

Angelica N. Brissett (b.1991)

Thanks for reading, Pam x

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We Are Not Amused - Let's Have A Laugh

The comment “We are not amused” is widely believed to have been said by Queen Victoria in response to an inappropriate joke or remark made by an equerry. I can’t help but wonder what the equerry actually said in front of the queen. If he was trying to make her laugh, perhaps he was shocked to discover it wasn’t acceptable. According to Queen Victoria’s granddaughter, Alice, her grandmother told her that she hadn’t said “We are not amused” at all. Alice and other young members of the royal family of the time loved Queen Victoria’s sense of fun, finding her jolly with a great sense of humour. She laughed a lot and was amused by many things, apparently. In her later years, she gave the impression of an austere woman with strict moral values. I expect that she held the moral high ground, but I think her facial expression after the death of Prince Albert showed her grief and huge sense of loss rather than austerity.

Laughing is good for us. Seeking amusement, we look for the comedy, the cheerful light-hearted recreations that will make us feel uplifted and happy. It is personal choice, we all have our favourites whether we are going out to be entertained or choosing what to have on TV. Sometimes, the really hilarious moments are self-made. This is definitely the case with my crazy family. Put me in the company of my wonderful niece and within seconds we will have sparked each other into squeals of laughter, usually about nothing, and I will be crying and rushing to the loo with comments about double strength Tena pads making me laugh even more. If her mother, my sister is with us, the hilarity is increased and the three of us are best left to it. We can’t help it. We still laugh at things that happened years ago. At my nephew’s wedding ceremony I broke the silence of a solemn moment with a very loud, giant snort. I will never live it down. I was trying not to cry and holding my breath then the snort just happened. The mirth has lasted far longer than his marriage did, sadly for him. My father had a ‘thing’ about curtains being closed correctly. Two curtains would have to meet exactly in the middle, the drapes had to be equal and the overlap had to be uniform all the way down. It didn’t matter who closed the curtains, he would have to give his finishing touch. Perfectionist. At his funeral service, my sister and I couldn’t look at each other as the curtains closed in front of his coffin. We were both thinking the same thing and finding amusement in the saddest of circumstances. It proved our resilience.

That is us. Amused and amusing at the same time, like lots of families. Queen Victoria and Prince Albert had a large family. I hope they laughed heartily at daft things and had silly moments like we do. I hope they broke the silence with a massive snort, or worse, and I hope, like us, they were amused more often than they were not.

I found this poem,

I’m not sure it it’s fact or rumour,
Queen Victoria lost her humour,
Deciding one day she refused
All attempts to be amused.

Some say it was indigestion,
Others claim that’s speculation.
I believe what’s widely known,
That she hurt her funny bone.

Phil Ward, 2012

Thanks for reading, Pam x

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The Post-mortem of a Clown

When writing about comedy, and in particular jokes, the subject will inevitable become a discussion about taste, oppression, offence and bullying. It’s an unfortunate truth about funny, that is, more often than not, there has to be a fall guy.

So in the pursuit of the perfect joke, that is a joke that appeals to all, one has to understand how a joke works.

First rule of a classic joke is the SET UP and PUNCH LINE. A question has to be posed that is seemingly unanswerable with a guess. This engages the audience, sparks their interest and tunes them in. The question is intriguing, it stops the audience thinking about anything else. It is asked in such a way that it has the same stopping power as a slap in the face. 

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"

With in seconds of hearing the question the audience becomes almost obsessed to the point of a mini frenzy.

“Come on! Why did the BLOODY CHICKEN CROSS THE FRIGGING ROAD?”

The answer, when delivered becomes a release of this tension and results in the laugh, groan or profanity telling the comic to leave.

The second rule, be surreal. The whole set up is designed to create the need for an answer and put the audience off guard. Chickens crossing roads is not a normal occurrence in most peoples lives. This sets up the non reality. If you make the opening argument too close to reality and maybe even plausible the audience will actually consider it as an idea rather than develop the need to know. 

Even topical jokes follow this rule only. The opening proposition usually contains the news story, this makes the audience take note. Hear they are not as much desperate for the answer, more anticipating how outrageous the answer is going to be.

“I can’t believe you just said that?”

The punch line still has be far enough away from the truth to be a shock rather than a plausible idea.

The problem with trying to find the perfect joke for all is the very high profile modern take on offence. A topical joke will, due to the fact that everyone will have an opinion on the news story, cause someone somewhere to choose to be offended by it. 

So the perfect joke cannot be topical, but it must be familiar. Rule 3, don’t exclude the audience.

The perfect joke must have the question, be surreal and yet have a punch line that will strike a cord with everyone. Something that you know everyone will know.

Who doesn't know what a chicken looks like? Or understands the idea of shouting through a door to find out who’s on the other side?

So the prefect joke is a non offensive, surreal scenario with an all too familiar outcome that everyone can understand and relate too. And I think I've found it.

Ladies and Gentleman, for your consideration, I give you:

The Perfect Joke

Q: What did the inflatable teacher, of the inflatable school say to the inflatable pupil?

A: You've let me down, you've let the school down and worst of all, you've let yourself down.

And if the description of why this is funny came after the joke it would be the post-mortem of a Clown, which just isn't funny at all. 

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