It seems I seldom get any time to myself these days - yet I relish my solitude. In fact I need it! I say to friends "No, I need that day to myself ."
Perhaps it's because I'm an only child and I got used to making my own entertainment,whiling away the hours by myself, keeping myself occupied.
I've now been widowed ten years next month, and the time has flown by. I've done things I might never have done as one in a 'couple'. Not that I'm saying I've particularly enjoyed being without my partner and I'd wish him back. It's just that it's been rather liberating being able to make my own choices, in my own time , doing things that I enjoy. I know, you may think me callous, but there's a certain freedom in not saying "Shall we ?" or "I'm going out, you don't mind?" etc. Not that he minded anyway, but it is rather uplifting to not have to consider anyone but me!
Most of you will be aware that I go away in my wee microcamper and go hillwalking, on my own. Actually it's not lonely as I meet so many interesting people. When walking quietly on my own I'm more likely to encounter wildlife. I allow myself plenty of time to stop, look around, take photos, and just enjoy the surroundings. It's not uncommon to find me talking to myself, or creatures....even singing softly.
Yes. I relish my solitude. It's food for the soul. It's essential. So today's few words are about walking alone.....
Walking Alone
If, when walking a lonely path, I saw you.
I'd never let you pass me by-
I'd hold your arm, touch your cheek,
Run my fingers through your hair
And endlessly gaze into your eyes.
If, when trekking a lonely trail, I saw you.
I'd softly call your name-
I'd take your hand, kiss your lips,
Stroke your arm, feel your strength
And gaze into your slate blue eyes.
But, no matter where I roam, you're never there.
For you are gone from me forever,
Never again to see your face,
Hear your hearty laugh,
Feeling your breathe on my neck,
Touch you in the night.
The paths I walk, I walk alone.
Thanks for reading, and apologies for recent absence...Kath.
2 comments:
I'm very happy to oblige Kath. Welcome back - for today at least - after your hiatus. Thanks for this 'silver lining' blog and a very moving poem about your ongoing sense of loss, beautifully expressed.
That is a lovely poem.
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