written and posted by members of Lancashire Dead Good Poets' Society

Friday 16 April 2021

Northern Men Just Grunt

I wonder if you have ever participated in a personality test? The sort of thing that tries to work out what type of personality you are. For example, are you an extrovert or an introvert? Do you get your energy from being with people or from spending time on your own? 

The idea behind such tests is to try and encourage you to value your strengths and then work on any areas of weakness, so that you can better relate to others and work well in a team.

Many years ago, when I lived in London, I was asked to participate in such a test by an organization. However, the premise behind the test was rather compromised by the leader indicating her view that ‘Northern Men just grunt’. 

In her world a man from the north wasn’t capable of intellectual or sensitive comment on life or relationships. A grunting response was all men from the north could give. So, ‘eh’, ‘yer what’, ‘uh’, ‘erm’ was about the extent of the interaction. This view was aimed at several of us who were in her eyes from the north and whom she hoped to ‘civilize’ in some way by taking the test. It made for an interesting discussion, especially when I revealed that I was not in fact a Northern Man, but was from Hertfordshire!

I don’t suppose such a thing would be allowed to be said in a public way these days, but do such stereotypes still exist, even if only in people’s minds?


Northern Men Just Grunt

It has been said, ‘northern men just grunt’,
they’re bad at fashion, good at decadence
and can’t grasp basic common sense.
The conclusion really is that blunt.
It’s no use asking men, they don’t suit
introspection, it confuses them
and when feeling trapped, they go dumb –
it’s their monosyllabic front.

But men don’t put everything on display,
like furniture that’s flat packed.
We believe opposites can attract.
Come with your over- flowing cup today
and show that you’re an eloquent catch.
We could be two mugs that match.

Thanks for reading,
David Wilkinson

4 comments:

Binty said...

It's only a sort of Northern Sonnet - how lovely. 👏

Steve Rowland said...

Yes David, I've been subjected to a number of those tests in my time, DISC, Myers-Briggs, SJT et cetera. Not one of them correctly identified me as the rounded human being I am. ;-)

I enjoyed your blog, revelled in the fact that you were able to debunk the stereotypical view held by your southern assessor (obviously promoted way beyond the level of her capabilities), and loved your wry poem. Very good.

Ruth Maxwell said...

That's a really good poem and a very funny picture.

Mac Southey said...

I've had to do some of those tests. If they are assessed impartially they can be useful. I've seen the picture before and it is very funny. I really enjoyed the poem.