Arrrrr. The only form of piracy not covered this week I
think is internet piracy. I have no desire to get into a debate about that
really, that sounds like no fun at all.
Pirates are not as threatening as they used to be are they
though? They are comical little characters who shout “Arrr, me hearties” a lot
and carry parrots on their shoulders. I’m sure those who have been robbed by
genuine pirates in the past few years can vouch for the fact that they are
actually scary ruthless criminals. Who will kill you if they need to. They
might not make you walk the plank but they might stab you. Or shoot you.
Like
highwaymen they have become romanticised and caricatures of what they once
were. They are the stuff of children’s books. Children dress up in pirate costumes.
Would you let a 5 year old dress up as Fred West? I probably would for a laugh
but most people wouldn’t, it’s a bit weird. But they think nothing of popping
an eye patch on them and encouraging them to wield a cutlass. Which is actually
a really big sharp knife for cutting people with. And making them dead.
I remember a film from when I was a lot younger called The Fog. I think it was written by Stephen King. It was obviously quite scary. The fog would descend on a seaside village and with it brought death to anyone caught in it. And guess what was in the Fog we find out near the end? Pirates. Scary ones, proper villainous murderous pirates who cut people to bits. Bring back the scary ones please.