Tuesday, 27 March 2012

... and Villains

A How to guide to being bad:

1) Grow a silvery grey coat flecked with charcoal.
2) Acquire a long snout (perfect for sniffing out grandmas).
3) Make your ears large and pointy (ideal for hearing red-hooded little girls)
4) Buy several pairs of fake wolf claws, extra sharp. (Available from all large supermarkets)
5) Make sure that your teeth are slightly yellow and razor-sharp.
6) Practice making scary, evil sound: a snarl, a growl or a grumble.
7) Learn the art of disguise (pigs and little girls can be clever creatures).
8) Do breathing exercise every morning in order to increase lung capacity.

Thank you for reading,



Ashley R Lister said...

A big bad wolf doing Tantric breathing exercises?

Shouldn't Lindsay be illustrating this?



Shaun said...

I'd love Lindsay to illustrate this Ash.
This post made me think just how cliched some villains are when just created with formulaic procedures. An interesting curve ball, Lar.

PS The plan was to make us think about characters and established 'norms', right? :)

Lara Clayton said...

That was exactly the plan :)

Note to self: give posts a proper introduction before posting what's inside your mind. Don't try to be minimal; it doesn't work.

Ps. I think Lindsay is probably far too busy with her MA to be illustrating my little pieces of nonsense.